2012: In Retrospect

2012: In Retrospect
Year 2012 is almost at a close. This journey back to me has been AMAZING! I have experienced a few set-backs (so thankful that He is a forgiving God!) and many victories.  This year started with a bang - a wonderful fellowship with friends on Jan 1 at Che's. The food was fantastic but the conversations were off the chain. It was a good start to a great year.

God always has a plan...In February, April and May, I experienced an abnormal pap smear with possible cancerous cells, chest pains, several breast cancer screenings ...They scared me into a healthier lifestyle. God always has a plan...

I began my journey back to me on April 16th by stepping through the open door at TML Turn Me Loose Fitness. With those few steps, I started, what I hope is lifelong, a friendship with Cassandra Wycko (owner/operator of TML) and Rosalind Wilson along with a host of others...these women are my inspiration.  Each of us walked through those doors for various reasons and prayed for the same outcome - to be healthier and to drop the unwanted (inches, depression, emotions, etc). Well, we did it! We dropped the weight and a few unnecessary pieces bagage through a different kind of fellowship - exercise & dialogue.

I am proud to say that I have dropped approximately 26lbs and 30 inches since walking into that studio on April 16, 2012. #thestruggleisreal

                                (left: May 2012          right: November 2012)

To some its not much but for me, it may be small but a victory nonetheless!!!! Thanks to Cassandra, the TML staff, Ros, Wendy as well as Nina J, Che A, Kathy M, my FB fam and all those who are constantly encouraging me.

2012 Prayer of Thanks
As I look back over the last 12 months all I can say is Thank You Lord! Thank you Lord for seeing me through 2012. I pray that it is Your will that You will see me through 2013. Thank You for my family. Flaws and all - we are family! Thank You for my child. Thank You for her work ethics, her study ethics and her love which is 2nd to You. Thank You for opportunities granted and opportunities held. Thank You for allowing me to foster relationships with those from my past as well as new relationships. Lord, I pray that You will continue to allow me to shape this vessel into a living testimony of Your love, commitment, grace, and mercy. It is my hope that all who pass me by will be able to feel my faith in You and my fear of You.

I say a special prayer for all of those who work in EMS. It is truly a calling of commitment from You. I pray for their strength, health and safety - whether they are EMTs, Paramedics, Operations Staff, Mechanics or Front Office Support. God be with those who are volunteers or work for a service provider - county, city and theme park alike. All small victories come from You...the flow of blood; the next heartbeat; the next breath; the first cry of life...all come from You.

It is in Your magnificent name I pray...Amen

Watch out for new things in 2013 (including my return to an EMS agency). I stepped out of that box in 2012 - I'm gonna crush the box in 2013!!!!

Thanks for continuing to ride on this #journeyback2me....it ain't over!!!!

Why TML Fitness???

Yesterday, one of my co-workers asked me how much I paid for my TML Fitness membership. I replied with "$100 a month unlimited access with a 3-month commitment." He then said for $30 a month I could join one of the gyms he teaches at.  I thought about it for only a second and this was my reply:

Do they have an array of class options that will keep my interest (I have a short attention span and when bored will move on)?  (still waiting for an answer)
Do your gyms offer a specialized boot camp to prepare me for basic pole dancing? No.
Do they offer pole dancing? Don't think so...
Do they offer any cardio classes other than Zumba and Spinning such as Booty Beat? Nah.
Do they offer specific area classes like Glute Camp? Ahhhhh-NO!
Do they have a Bendy/Flexy class that helps my flexibility whether its on a pole or on the ground? Nope.
Well, do they at least have a class to help me feel good about the skin I'm in like TML Sexy Camp Pole Burlesque or  Sexy Fundamentals Progressive Pole? I don't think so...They will never have Chair-to-Pole, Hip-Hop Pole, Twerk It or Pilates Pole Fusion (which I won't be taking anytime soon).

Do these gyms have owners who get to know their patrons and do they take that extra step to help them achieve their goals?  Do the owners work out with their patrons, encouraging them daily; calling them when they are not there to make sure everything is all right?  I'm thinking no...Do these owners take a personal interest in their patrons and staff alike? Is it a family atmosphere? Do they make the size 26 female feel as good about herself as they do the size 6 female? Do they gawk and stare at the BBW as she struggles to work out her body and mind or do they encourage her and offer different avenues for achieving her goals? Do these said owners/mgrs try to manipulate the weight-challenged individuals into buying personal training packages up front knowing the "trainer" will be devoting your paid time to you and her and her and her...?

So I go to TML Fitness because of the atmosphere, attitude and array of offerings. I may complain about the workouts but I do them to the best of my ability. I refuse to give up on myself especially when I have a group of women who won't give up on me. I will not disappoint them or myself.  I like the all-women atmosphere. I am comfortable there - its not a competition. You don't have to worry about who is looking at you or whether I look ridiculous (we all look ridiculous)...its not a fashion show and you are not there to impress.  We are all sweaty and funky and its OK! My paid PT time is mine even when I want her to help someone else and look the other way so I can continue with creative counting (1-2-3-6-9-15-20).

I don't mind paying for TML Fitness because I am reaping on the return tenfold. I have lost 23lbs and 16.5 inches since May. More importantly, I feel great. My self-esteem is better than ever. I have new life-long relationships with women of all races, ages and sizes (yeah, even skinny bitches...lol)...

In my "Journey Back To Me", TML Fitness allows me to encourage others while they encourage me...Thanks Cassandra, Chriss, Laura, Karen and Candice!!!

Oh so lovin' the skin I'm in....

I've Been back - You Just Didn't Know It

So, its been a while (5 months & 10 days to be exact) since I last blogged...a lot has happened.  The main thing is that I have lost almost 22 lbs and 11.5 inches.  OK, so it was all accomplished in the last 8 weeks but the important thing is that it was done.  YAY me!!!!

I found this great studio in Raleigh - TML Beauty and Fitness in Brier Creek. I love this place!!! Cassandro Wycko is the owner/operator and she has a great staff to work with. She offers pole dancing, Zumba, Hip Hop Cardio, a killer homegrown class called Twerk It, and a fabulous Pole Flex Fusion Boot Camp.  Check out her website for class information, schedules and prices - http://www.tmlturnmeloose.com. 

I also learned/figured out that you can find some really good deals on Groupon and Living Social.  But beware - you can get some duds too...check the place out before you purchase...

Any-who! I started a weight-loss challenge at TML on May 15th and lost 11.5 inches...I am extremely proud of myself because during the challenge I injured my knee (from walking the track at Duke University- of all things). The TML staff worked with me with my workouts and I was still able to lose.

Today, I am 7lbs shy of my end of summer goal...this is why I feel no way guilty for eating this pizza!

Its boot camp at 7am in the morning...have a great evening...

I can do this...

My trainer, Alo, is from LA and is awesome! He is an aerobics instructor at several gyms in the area and he works with me.  When he is in LA he trains under Joseph Ojomoh...have you heard of him? No problem...I hadn't either until Alo showed us his FB profile and explained who he is.  He ain't no joke! Hell, Alo ain't no joke. 

Well, we had session 2 of PowerBox...all I can say is "OWWWWCH!!!!   KJ was not feeling well so she was not there; TP3 talked shit but didn't show (he says he will be there next week - we'll see); my Motivation was there and did better than the last time. It was good after I got past the point of wanting an ambulance. I can do this. I can do this. I CAN DO THIS!!!

I'm feeling good. I'm trying to eat better - I even started eating tilapia.  I even emailed Chef Jay (outta Charlotte) to get some different ways of cooking tilapia.  Yes, I can do this!!!

If you want to see more of what Ojomoh is doing, check out this website: http://www.ojomohpowerbox.com He cray-cray (as my Motivation would say)...

1 step at a time...make it do what it do!

Whoa!

Have you ever had one of those WHOA! moments - that moment that you see God's path for you unfolding right before your eyes?  I just had one. 

It goes back maybe a year or four - I'm not sure how long ago, but I had a vision...yes, a vision (it was not a dream because I was not sleep; visions appear when you are wide awake).  In the vision I was working in an office area but not at TIAA-CREF (my old employer); I was scheduling (as I am doing now) but I was not in Charlotte.  Everything I did 30 - 45 minutes ago was in that vision.  Once I completed the tasks at hand, I remembered the vision - that was God slapping me - telling me to continue to believe and have faith; He's got this! One of HIS defining moment...

God was preparing me long time ago for this move - I just didn't know it.  Well, I know it now.  I thank Him for it all..the layoff, the depression, the kick in the butt from my sister, the EMT class, the EMT jobs, the relationships created from those experiences, the opportunities that have been presented to me, and now, the job not in Charlotte...God is too good to me!  Even though I really want to move back to Charlotte, I realize that I am here for a reason. I will stay here as long as He tells me to. 

I say all this b/c I want someone to realize that YOU might realize HE is there but HE is!!! It will all be revealed in HIS time not your time.  Rev. Claude R. Alexander stated in one of his sermons "If I gotta wait a little longer, that just means I have to live a little longer.." 

Trust & Believe...give it to God and be let HIM to what HE does...

P/L/B (Peace/Love/Blessings) sm2

Its About To Be On

Well...its been a minute...I had a not-so mild case of bronchitis...its kinda hard to exercise when you can't breathe.  BUT!!!! Its about to be on...my friend, Alo, will start the boxing class tomorrow evening..we are gonna do it twice a week...the other days, I have to do cardio.  I can do this...You can do this...We can do this. We have to...our bodies are God's temples. We can't mistreat or misuse His temples...

Let's get ready for a wild ride...Alo has already said he is trying to hurt me - no pain, no gain...I had to remind him that if he hurts me then I can't work...that means it all falls on him....


Let's have a great day and make it do what it do....

Random thought: do something nice for someone else - an unexpected blessing for them.  Do it from your heart; don't wait for or expect a "thank you"...

One Word....

I've been quiet these last couple of days...one word - bronchitis.  Hopefully I'll be back at it in a couple of days...

Peace, love & happiness...go make it do what it do!

My Psalm of Thanks...

 My Psalm of Thanks...01/01/12 00:44
When I felt like I couldn't go any further, You took my hand and led me on. When I didn't know what to do,  You put it in my heart and got me through - the sad times, the rough paths, the sense of dispair - it was You that got me to the other side of those feelings (love).
I know I can't do this alone - this life I'm livin'; the life You gave me...I know I can't do this alone.
You said You would never leave me nor forsaken me as long as I trust and believe that You are the Great I Am.
I trust!
I believe!
I know!
I am Your living testimony!
I humble myself in Your glorious presence. I thank You with all that I am and all that I do for you continuously guide me through what I consider my stormy times and my sunny days.
I am nothing without you....

Is there a benefit to workout when you are sick?

That's just not a title, its an actual question.  The answer: I don't know. My alarm went off at 4:15 (yes, in the morning) and I felt not so great...sinuses ached; face hurt; throat burning and raw...so I decided I wasn't going to work out. I needed to rest before work.  I laid in bed squirming to get my spot warm and said "God, if I need to be there, please-oh-please, get me there." I turned on my laptop and started reading posts from the Girlfriend Fit Club: not interested, don't care, can't do it...then I saw one from Astrid P. This chick made me feel more guilty than I already felt. She listed her weekly activities...Insanity, Belly dancing, Bowling, etc. All I said was "Thanks God...see you at the gym."

So, 36-degrees in Durham, me &my  MOTIVATION made it to the gym. We switched it up this morning; she got on the elliptical and I got on the treadmill. Yeah, that lasted all of 15-min. The treadmill told me to stick to our bargain - stay off until I can do 25-min straight. I then got on the stationary bike for a 15-min fit test. 30-min cardio - DONE!!!!

At this time, the elliptical, treadmill, bike and I had a meeting of my mind...We decided that I would start doing a 45-min cardio routine that will include 15-min on the treadmill and 30-min on either the elliptical or bike.  WE CAN DO THIS (yes, we can)!!!! To sweeten the pot, my co-worker Alo is going to start training me in boxing.  Yes, he is certified (in more ways than one) and yes, he has already said he is going to hurt me -I had to remind him that if I am hurt then I cannot work.  So within the next couple of weeks, we will start leg conditioning.

Pray for me (and for him)....

Have a great day and an inspiring weekend! Let's make it do what it do!!!!!

Peace & Blessings....

"In A Relationship"

I was talking to a friend today about my "Journey Back To Me" and decided to change my relationship status on FB to "in a relationship".  I'm in a relationship with ME! I guess I'm just realizing this isn't about losing weight even though that's how it started. I need to get back to the ME who enjoyed her career; the ME who loved to have fun with her MOTIVATION; the ME who didn't mind working all day then hangin' out with friends late into the night. This Journey Back To Me" is about strengthening my relationship with me AND with God. Rev. Alexander made a statement Sunday that has stuck with me; he said " if you gotta wait a little longer that just means you have to live a little longer." Marinate on that. Turning another year older should not be dreaded; it should be embraced and I need to get back to that. 

When did things change - May 9, 2009. The day I was laid off from a job that I loved.  That was the beginning of a new chapter; a new career and a new me.  Now I need to establish a link between the new ME and the old ME.

Its on and poppin' ya'll...let's make it do what it do!!!

The Day after Day 8: Its Cold as a Witches T...

Good morning! Its a cold day in Durham (22 degrees)...but I got it in! My MOTIVATION got me up at 4:30 this morning and we were in the gym by 4:45am.  Yes, yes I did drive to the gym this morning.  I can't do it - after I workout I am sweating bullets. I can't see me walking in below-freezing temperatures back to the apt.

It was a cardio day for me so 35 minutes on the elliptical and a nice stretch.  Nothing interesting happened.  Happy my MOTIVATION is feeling better and getting back in the swing of things...she will have a Cheetah-licious body sooner rather than later!


Let me get my grind on...Have a great day!!! Don't forget to make it do what it do!

Day 8: Baby, Its Cold Outside...

Last Monday (12-26) as I sat on my couch watching TV, my child took a picture of me...it was hideous. I had kept saying in 2012, I am going to lose weight.  Well, when I saw that pic, I decided I could not wait until the new year...It was time.  I asked her not to take anymore pictures of me b/c I did not like the way I looked and asked her to help me in this journey...Her name is MOTIVATION.

So, Day 1 (12-27): I worked out alone at 4:30am in the complex gym...nothing big - 30 min cardio on the elliptical.

Day 2 (12-28): My MOTIVATION took her new name to heart.  My MOTIVATION woke me up at 4:07; my MOTIVATION walked briskly with me to the gym; my MOTIVATION started when I started; my MOTIVATION gave out while I still had 13 mins left on the elliptical...I love my MOTIVATION! 

Day 3 (12-28): My MOTIVATION wasn't feelin' it so I went it alone...YAY me!!!

Skip forward to Day 8 (01-02): My MOTIVATION isn't feelin' well so I went it alone. It was 26 degrees outside and somehow I made it into the gym...ok, so I drove but I made it...I'm willing to spend that $1.00 in gas instead of burning those 75 calories...I'll drink more water today...Have a great day everybody!!!!